These experiences have shaped who I am today, an independent woman, passionate about my career and working with local authorities in Greater Manchester to ensure every young person has a voice, choice and control over decisions made about them., Psychodynamic psychotherapist and director of Integrated Minds and Artists on the Couch. His Landmark poems are visible in London, Manchester, Huddersfield and Addis Ababa. We sweated until one of us, invariably Christopher, would burst into tears. Lemn Sissay, writer and Chancellor of the University of Manchester, held the Great Hall of Bolton School Girls Division mesmerised during an emotional rollercoaster of an evening. They were my parents and I loved them unconditionally. It's the first time in many years . Sissay realised he'd been stolen. You dont love us, you dont want to be with us? All of this happened the day after they had made this call to the social worker. Moving unexpectedly from subject to subject, he thanked the girls for producing such wonderful flags devoted to his poetry which he had seen on the English corridor and said had truly moved him. Axa Hynes, right, with her foster sister Michelle Brown, also featured in the Foundling Museum photograph. Sissay has spoken out about his care experience and its many traumas throughout his career as a poet and broadcaster. Christopher, Sarah and I were on top of the world. I had teachers who put me in a box once they knew my background and said, Youll end up doing no good. Reynolds, who contributed to her mother Margarets 2021 book about adoption, The Wild Track, now studies ancient history and social anthropology at St Andrews and is involved in activist groups. I felt incredibly cared for and looked after., When Paolo Hewitt was researching his care memoir, The Looked After Kid, in his early 40s, he went back to Burbank childrens home in Woking, where he lived from 10 to 18, and realised that it was actually a great experience, especially compared with the dismal years in foster care that preceded it. Jenny Bagchi spent time in foster care and unregulated settings as a teenager before experiencing an abrupt end to care at 16. Interspersing readings from his new collectionGold from the Stonewith moving and raw recollections of his childhood, Lemn transfixed the audience. Soon afterwards she died of cancer and De Abreu ended up, after several foster placements, living in the notorious Jersey childrens home Haut de la Garenne. When I was in the childrens homes, for years, I would play table tennis against a wall and imagine I was playing with him. 31 December 1979: Message left after Christmas saying that the Greenwoods wanted Norman removed without further notice. Social workers report, 31 December 1979: Spoke to foster parents on telephone. We fought with unbridled determination the way brothers do. She is now employed by the NHS in Greater Manchester, leading a programme to create trauma responsive communities and organisations and to improve health outcomes and opportunities across the region. Lemn Sissay MBE is a British author and broadcaster. 4.15. (He later rejoined his mother after she remarried.) Just before leaving the house, Mum looked at me. A school report calling the boy "a ray of sunshine" is probed for racist overtones, and happily exonerated. We need to prioritise the voices of people with lived experience of care, she says. SOS #Dare2Care Gwynedd Council is calling for more care workers in Gwynedd. I was shifted like I had never existed. "I found out about your past and then I heard you on Desert Island Discs," Lisa told Lemn . I opened the door to allow that to happen. Now he works as a theatre-maker working with young and emerging artists, many of whom are also care-experienced. Christopher was their first-born, but I was their first. All images courtesy of contributors, Council where Logan Mwangi was murdered worryingly dependent on agency care, Councils in England and Wales pay 1m a year to house child in private care home, Private childrens home bosses in England criticised over huge profits, Council paid 60k a week for wholly unsuitable place for vulnerable girl, Almost a third of disabled children and teenagers face abuse, global study finds, UKhas sleepwalked into dysfunctional childrens social care market, says regulator, Revealed: money for educating excluded children funded Bolton bar owners social life, Bolton childrens home shut down for serious and widespread failures, Access to NHS mental health for children remains a postcode lottery, Childrens social care system unfit for purpose in England, Key to the photo of people whove spent time in care, with a list of their names, the notorious Shirley Oaks childrens home. He has authored collections of poetry and plays. Being adopted is definitely something that puts a mark on you, says fashion and portrait photographer Philip Sinden. It maybe shapes certain aspects of your character and your attitude to life, says Tom Riordan of the experience of being in care. There are many strings to the bow of Lemn Sissay OBE. Tomorrow came and I said it with pride because I thought I had found the answer they wanted me to find: I mustnt love you, I said. I appreciate it.. My mother had schizophrenia, I had a stepfather who was very violent to my mother and to me. He thrives on praise and affection, in fact he cannot do without it. Social workers report, I hadnt realised I wasnt a happy child. LEMN SISSAY. It's a bolt from the blue. Marcus Clarke with his new carer on the day he entered NCH Sheringham. He reflected how he had since forgiven his foster parents, saying they did the best they could and he had also received apologies from Wigan Council. At the time, I looked exactly like my father and was the same age as he was when I was conceived. My Name Is Why: Quick Reads 2022: Amazon.co.uk: Sissay, Lemn: 9781838854645: Books Skip to main content .co.uk Hello Select your address Lemn Sissay, My Name Is Why. Lucy Sheen, whose Chinese name is Chau Lai-Tuen, aged one in the home of her adoptive parents. She left home at 16 after coming out as gay an experience depicted in her 2011 memoir, Why Be Happy When You Could Be Normal? I would narrate the game against Christopher, my invisible brother and Id let him win. Gilt of Cain by Michael Visocchi & Lemn Sissay This powerful sculpture was unveiled by the Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Mpilo Tutu on 4 th September 2008. Mcintosh managed to make it to university and now runs a Caribbean restaurant, Sugarcane London, in Wandsworth, but he remains scarred by his experiences. Lucy Sheen was one of 106 Hong Kong Chinese foundlings who were adopted by white British families in the 1950s and 60s. 4 October 1979: The Greenwoods are seen by Norman as his parents, and they and their natural children meet his needs in every way. Social workers report. Now my mindset is slightly different. As with most brothers, Christopher and I fought like snakes on each others territory. In care from 11 to 17, Ben Ashcroft moved 51 times between foster parents, residential care, secure units, secure training centre, and finally a young offenders unit. She showed him a letter that she had written in 1968, 4 months after he had been born, in which she pleaded, to no avail, that he be given back to her to live with his own people. It was amazing to find him and realise where I get my activism from., Social work leader, campaigner and charity trustee. Mum and Dad must have told everyone in my family to stay away from me. In 1984, at 17, he was sent to Wood End Assessment Centre, a remand home in Wigan. I asked when my clothes and toys would be arriving. The summer variety show hes directing with his students at Bird College, in Sidcup, south-east London, includes a song from the pickpocketing musical Oliver!, poignantly titled Boy for Sale. His zodiac sign is Gemini. Interspersing readings from his new collection Gold from the Stone with moving and raw recollections of his childhood, Lemn transfixed the audience. One dual carriageway, with a single destination: Woodfields. 19 April 1978: There is a letter on file from Normans mother, written in 1968, requesting he be returned to her in Ethiopia perhaps Norman should be made aware of this? Social workers report, on which someone has written in block capitals, NOT YET I THINK. They were just friends, says Cato, now an expert on Antiques Roadshow. Im out here, on my own, doing the best I can, with the very little that any family member is going to offer me. In and out of care from the age of five, Stanley J Browne says his horror story began aged eight, when he was separated from his siblings and fostered off to Nottingham. Here is an extract from the book. I showed my love for him by punching him. At the age of seventeen, after a childhood in a foster family followed by six years in care homes, Norman Greenwood was given his birth certificate. One of the best things [foster care] has given me is the knowledge that it doesnt need to be a totally typical family setup to work, he says. He has been with this family since he was a couple of months old and Mrs Greenwood considers him as theirs. Charles Dickenss orphan Oliver Twist is one of scores of names plastered over the walls of the room where the volunteers gather for coffee and biscuits before the shoot, along with James Bond, Jane Eyre, Han Solo and Huckleberry Finn. I still think love is the most important thing. Though it was clear she loved and cared for us, my foster mum used to beat us with a cane. Her experience of finding herself homeless and powerless after leaving care inspired her to start a campaign, calling4gr8ness.org to support young care leavers in the same predicament. I had nothing to put in the locker by my bed. You just get used to battling with everybody all the time, and you always have your guard up. Lemn Sissay is a BAFTA-nominated, award-winning international writer and broadcaster. There were times when Dad was charged with punishing me in the front room with the cane. Its really horrible.. Sissay was the official poet of the 2012 London Olympics, has been Chancellor of the University of Manchester since 2015, and joined the Foundling Museum's Board of Trustees two years later, having previously been appointed one of the museum's Fellows.--This text refers to the audioCD edition. He has been made an Honorary Doctor by the universities of Manchester, Kent, Huddersfield and Brunel. . He learned that his real name was not Norman. I started thinking all over again. I waited in the kitchen by my mum. April 1974: Im seven. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy, when skies are grey. I believed her. This was the beginning of empty Christmas time and hollow birthdays. Postscript: After Woodfields, Lemn Sissay was sent to two more childrens homes. Even this Great Hall, he reminded the audience, had been imagined by an architect before it had been built. The project is the brainchild of poet and activist Lemn Sissay, himself a graduate of the system, who wanted to create an image of successful lives as an inspiration for the many thousands of children struggling in care today. James McMahon 'I was so proud to be the official poet of the 2012 Olympic Games': Lemn Sissay. My own success happened in spite of my time in care, not because of it. Photograph: Hamish Brown/Contour The poet and broadcaster, 55, on the power of forgiveness,. Im always moving on to the next thing and thinking somethings going to go wrong., Artistic director, 20 Stories High theatre company. These moments stuck in my memory. Lemn Sissay is a poet, author and broadcaster who was the official poet of the London Olympics in 2012. Buy My Name Is Why: Quick Reads 2022 Main - Quick Reads by Sissay, Lemn (ISBN: 9781838854645) from Amazon's Book Store. There are a lot of big emotions flying around the room. Every one of us has a different story, says Sissay, beaming around the room in a shirt that is playing catch-up with the sun. Rosie Canning, aged four, as a bridesmaid to her foster mothers son, 1962. I had no idea Mum thought it was my fault. None of us have ever looked into our birth parents, he says. Seek and ye shall find. This is what they wanted to seek. I loved the sibling rivalry. Now hes a national adviser for England, advising the government and local authorities how to have a better leaving care offer to the more than 80,000 kids that weve got in care. And he learned that his mother had been pleading for his safe . He dived into Mums arms and said: Mum, I beat Norman, didnt I? She stroked his head and said: Yes, you did. And then she looked at me. Being in foster care is probably the primary reason why I had a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder, says Derek Owusu, whose award-winning debut novel, That Reminds Me, explores the after-effects of a childhood in care. Best known for designing clothes for Diana, Princess of Wales, Bruce Oldfield was born in Durham and fostered at 18 months by a seamstress, Violet Masters, who taught him how to sew. Sissay spent 12 years with the Greenwoods. Available in used condition with free delivery in the UK. Sheen has made a documentary about her experience, a powerful study of cultural displacement and linguistic disenfranchisement called Abandoned Adopted Here. The journey took about 45 minutes, or 45 seconds. At the age of 17, after a childhood in a foster family followed by six years in care homes, Norman Greenwood was given his Birth Certificate. This was the beginning of the end of open arms and warm hugs. None of this is your fault. She left you She didnt want you If I find her, I will scratch her eyes out How could she My mums love was elevated by how much she hated my birth mother for leaving me. Its listening to care-experienced young people Ive been working with that has empowered me to talk openly about it., Donna Ludford applied to become lord mayor of the City of Manchester to raise aspirations for young people in the care system. Raise me with sunshineBathe me in lightWash all the shadowsThat fell from the night, 11 December 1974: There are no problems with Norman. My grandad had a cottage in Lochinver we would visit in the summer holidays and at Easter. In the Baptist church, our church, we were taught to question why. My name, my brother . I know from reading the very brief information I have on my birth parents that my natural mother wanted me to have a better life than she could give me, he says. I sat at the table and my mum looked at me intensely. Because its not just my story, its the story of the people that have been kind enough to reconnect with me and the people that were selfless enough to bring me up. Poet Lemn Sissay, with the help of London's Foundling Museum, has gathered 59 athletes, artists, CEOs and others who, like him, spent part of their childhoods in care. These are social graces that help us to move on.. I always thought it was something I had to hide. As much as you read this book and are in shock (or not) at how this young black child was dragged through a problematic system and feel angry at the injustices he has faced, you can't . At 12, Norman was sent away to childrens homes. I had no pictures, no photographs. One of the greatest signs of my own sense of independence when I left care was the day I could ask for help when I needed it. His mother refused to sign the adoption papers. Adopted as a baby, Jeanette Winterson grew up in a strict Pentecostalist family in Lancashire. In that situation, a mother doesnt see her child, she is wrenched into the memory of the father. Now, as he approaches his 55th birthday, he's added another: children's writer. His Landmark poems are visible in London, Manchester, Huddersfield and Addis Ababa. He was taken into long-term foster care in Wigan and named Norman Greenwood. Sissay was the official poet of the 2012 London Olympics, has been chancellor of the University of Manchester since 2015, and joined the Foundling Museum's board of trustees two years later, having previously been appointed one of the museum's fellows. And thats all right, but thats the deal. Ripped away from his Ethiopian mother in infancy, he endured over a decade of mistreatment and wilful cruelty in the British care system. Backhand and forehand smash, defend and attack, spin, cut, lob and slice. Lemn Sissay said it was "a wonderful thing to be recognised as somebody who has got my kind of past" Poet Lemn Sissay has dedicated his OBE to his younger self who he said overcame a. Mum smelled like mums smell; there must be a smell a child is attuned to from being a baby, a cross between baby powder and witch hazel. I was in care. He didnt disclose his own experience to anyone at university until he co-founded a participatory research project called The Verbatim Formula in 2015. Wallwein later dramatised her search for her birth mother in the acclaimed one-woman show (later a book) Glue. LEMN SISSAY MBE is a BAFTA nominated International prize winning writer. I am, as I have ever been, interested to hear anything Catherine has to say about the eleven year old boy who she and her husband placed into care. When he was six, his adoptive mother died and he was sent to live with relatives for 15 months, until his father remarried and he moved back home. This is an edited extract from My Name Is Why: a Memoir by Lemn Sissay, published by Canongate on 29 August at 16.99. It was the sense of an underlining unkindness that stayed with me. Lemn Sissay: 'My foster parents were good people who did bad things' Interview by Donna Ferguson The poet talks about how his foster parents put him into care at the age of 12 and left him there,. ISBN-10: 1786892367 . Why - and the search for the answer to why - became the word that defined Lemn . He left school at 15 with one GCSE and two CSEs. Once in the care system, he became known as Chalky White and was moved to a new home each year, ending up at Woodend Assessment Centre, near Westhoughton. His affectionate nickname was Bunty. Lemn told how in 1967 his mother, aged 21 and unaware that she was pregnant, left Ethiopia to study in England. I was born in the era of forcible adoption my mother was coerced into giving me up, says Louise Wallwein. He spoke of finding wreckage from the crash in the documentary Internal Flight which can be viewed on YouTube. You get to a point where you go, is my curiosity big enough to unsettle so much?, I became a journalist because I didnt see my community represented in the newsroom, says Sophia Alexandra Hall, an Oxford graduate who went into foster care as a teenager. Now Popoola is a novelist and an associate lecturer at Central Saint Martins in London. I know so many care-experienced people whove had that further experience of being homeless, being a rough sleeper, living in hostels, sofa-surfing, all that kind of stuff.. His biological mother had traveled to from Ethiopia to England in the late 1960s and because she was pregnant and single was pushed to put her baby up for adoption. Mr Sissay, who grew up in the care system, shared his concerns after a report, published by the. Samaritans is a 24-hour service offering emotional support for anyone struggling to cope. I hadnt realised then but none of them would contact me ever again for the rest of my life. He felt that Normans successes were too many for [his brother] Christopher to cope with. This is what I have chosen. I was just nudging into adolescence at the time, and theyd recently had their third child, Helen. They refused. By the time Sissay was approaching adolescence, cracks in their relationship had started to appear. He really put it on the map and allowed it to be something that we could be proud of as an identity and talk about as a political thing. My friends. The documents armed Sissay with the necessary proof that "the government had stolen my childhood.". Lemn Sissay is a poet, author and broadcaster who was the official poet of the London Olympics in 2012. Just before Christmas in 1983 the 16-year-old "Norman Greenwood" discovered his real name and Ethiopian roots in his birth certificate and some letters from a social worker. It felt affectionate then, but later I realised something wasnt right. After a succession of institutions, he left the care system, alone, and requested his files via customer services. Born in London, Henry was privately fostered at six months by a wonderful couple in Weston-super-Mare who encouraged her dreams of becoming an actor shes currently starring in Mad House in the West End. Poet Lemn Sissay, with the help of Londons Foundling Museum, has gathered 59 athletes, artists, CEOs and others who, like him, spent part of their childhoods in care. Where they are, we have been; where we are, they can go, says Akabusi who, like several others in the room, found his way through by joining the army. Mr and Mrs Greenwood realise there may be many problems ahead with Norman. The skies are grey. Lemn Sissay is an award-winning writer, poet, playwright, artist and broadcaster. They encouraged me in everything that Ive wanted to do. Which in Turners case meant becoming a musician hes a founder member of the rock band Elbow. Mr Sissay detailed his experiences in the British care system in his autobiography of his early life - My Name Is Why. I lost everybody. I spent my life searching for my birth family. Ive never used it in a serious way, and I absolutely never will, says Stewart Lee of mining his care experience for standup material he was in care for the first year of his life before being adopted by a couple in Solihull. I said to Norman Mills in the car: I know this is my fault and I will ask God for forgiveness. He kept his eyes on the road, but his hands gripped tighter on the wheel. Riddell wrote a memoir called The Cornflake Kid. Of course I loved them. Written with all the lyricism and power you would expect from one of the nation's . It is not sunny, but Lemn Sissay is sheltering behind dark shades, hunched over as he inhales cigarettes to feed his near-40-year habit. I loved my town. None of us have ever gone back to look for our birth families. But his writing tells a subtly different story: And so, nearly half a century later/ nearer to the end of the journey/ than the beginning,/ those questions arise/ and may remain unanswered/ but arise anyway.. Lemn means 'why' in Amharic, the official language of Ethiopia, where celebrated poet Lemn Sissay's mother was from. Sissay reflects on his childhood, self-expression and Britishness, and in doing so explores the institutional care system, race, family and the meaning of home. They wanted me to ask God for forgiveness and through him I will learn to love them. I wasnt given anything and nobody contacted me. The internationally acclaimed poet and playwright Lemn Sissay OBE shares the story of his life by recalling five memorable dishes. Photo-Greenbelt Over the weekend, black British author, poet and playwright Lemn Sissay did his nation and the black community proud by picking up the very prestigious 2019 Pen. My foster father was a teacher and my foster mother was a nurse. I wanted to tackle the sometimes subconscious, but overall still damaging stereotypes often perpetuated in the media, such as care-experienced people not achieving or succeeding in life due to their background. One thing many share is dark memories of the shame and stigma they suffered. He recalled how becoming 12 years old, he started to develop into an adolescent and told the odd lie and stayed out late occasionally. I felt important. She calls on the phone and and I walk in the garden as we speak. Lemn Sissay MBE, yes put some respeck on his name and add them last 3 letters. I studied the question for a day and a night, I prayed to God, and I read the Bible to see if a passage would answer the question. My home situation was dire. I was challenged with a lot of preconceived ideas and biases by the adults I was around, about whether I could be a mum and make it through against all odds. Walker managed to hold on to her child and was later able to focus on education, which saved me, she says. 3 January 1980: My mum wouldnt hug me as I left, so I hugged her. Yet in 1980, at the age of 12, young Norman was abruptly expelled from his white . Thats the number of times he was relocated between 11, when he and his brother were abandoned by their mother, and 17, when he decided he had to pull himself together. Now my foster mother sends me birthday cards. If youd asked me as a child, Id be like, Oh, Im adopted but its not a thing. Now he acknowledges that there is probably some degree of separation anxiety as a result of not being with my mother in those crucial first few weeks. The lecture was the latest in a series of Arts and Science presentations which are taking place at the School in the evenings and are open to the general public. In the process of tracking down his birth parents, which is ongoing, Chris Fretwell learned that he was given up for adoption to cover up a family scandal: his parents were first cousins. Through my lived experience of being adopted, I co-founded a mental-health organisation called Adoptee Futures, which is led by adoptees and which centres adoptees. 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